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Well, Mr. Citizen, I guess you've figured me
out. I seem to fit neatly in the category where you placed me. I am
stereotyped, characterized, standardized, classified, grouped, and always
typical. Unfortunately, the reverse is not true...I can never figure you
out.
From birth you teach your children that I'm the boogeyman and you're shocked
when they identify with my traditional enemy, THE CRIMINAL. You accuse me of
coddling juveniles until a catch your kid doing wrong. You take an hour for
lunch and several coffee breaks each day, but point me out as a loafer
if you catch me having just one cup.
You pride yourself on your polished manners, but think nothing of disrupting
my meals with your troubles. You raise hell with the guy who cuts you off in
traffic, but let me catch you doing the same thing and I'm picking on you.
You know all the traffic laws, but you've never gotten a simple ticket you
deserved. Your shout "FOUL!" if you see me driving too fast to an
emergency call, but raise hell if I take more than ten seconds to respond to
your call.
You call it part of my job if someone strikes me, but it's police brutality
if I strike back. You would not think telling your dentist how to pull a
badly-decayed tooth, or your doctor how to take out your appendix, but your
always willing to give me a few pointers on the law.
You talk to me in a manner that would assure a bloody nose from anyone else,
but expect me to take it without batting an eye. You cry "Something has
got to be done about the crime!" but you can't be bothered with getting
involved. You have no use for me at all, but of course it is O.K. if I
change a flat for your wife, or deliver your child in the back seat of my
radio car on the way to the hospital, or save your son's life
with-mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, or work many hours looking for your lost
daughter.
So, Mr. Citizen, you stand there on your soapbox and rant and rave about the
way I do my job, calling me every name in the book, but never stopping to
think that your property, your family, or maybe your life depends on me or
one of my buddies.
Yes, Mr. Citizen, it's me, the lousy cop!
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